I try to always be a friend and parent. Sometimes you just have to be a parent.
I do fun things with my kids to expose them to cool stuff and make memories, and being ungrateful or demanding doesn’t cut it. Spent a few hundred bucks to take my kids to BMX camp this week. One of my kids was being ungrateful, asking to bring 100 friends, being smart.
After already asking 5 times to rent a scooter… while at bike camp, and being told no he then asked me to rent a bike when he had 10 minutes left in the day when his brake line broke.
Also told him no.
And he asked again.
Then again.
Then again.
Meanwhile, his own friends were telling him to chill out. Annnnnd, that’s when the day ended real fast.
Told him unless he wanted to apologize, then we go to the local shop then he’d be without brakes. Without brakes = without bike, because not about to have him flying around tracks without brakes.
He didn’t apologize. He didn’t proceed to the repair shop.
Lesson 1
Today, he woke up with dad and brother already gone to camp. No bike. No camp.
Wasn’t long after that he apologized.
Told him to go to the local shop by the end of the day to get his bike repaired. Otherwise, he’d be sitting with me at the table all day while I work at the camp, which doesn’t sound too appealing.
Lesson 2
When he got to the shop they were busy. They said they could fix it, but not until tomorrow.
I told him to ask if he could pay extra to rush it. Acknowledge they were busy, thank them, then offer extra.
Understandable, he was nervous. So I called the shop.
“Hey, my son came in with the broken brake line. I know you’re busy. Was wondering if I could pay extra to work it in tonight? He’s up at BMX camp at Woodward this week and missed today. I’ll pay your shop fee, then Venmo you $50 on the side.”
Done faster than I could finish the sentence.
- Was relatable
- Showed compassion
- Showed vulnerability
- Asked for help
- Offered to compensate
Also saved money. He ended up charging me only for parts, and just the side money to his Venmo. $65 instead of $100.
Tricky balance trying not to make my kids think they can get their way, but I don’t think he is connecting those dots in this context.
Instead, it’s a good lesson in thinking outside of the box and valuing other people’s time.
